Buttflies and Other Unreal Clothing Inventions

[joew]

roges posted on another thread:

Butt'fly (Short version)

Keep Bobin bobin bobin
Though the wind is throbbin
Keep those wing a bobbin Butt’fly
Though a shed coccoon is better
This rainy windy weather
May drive me to the end of my fly

Bobbinup Bobbindown
Bobbinup Bobbindown
Bobbinup Bobbindown Butt’fly
Bobbindown Bobbinup
Bobbindown Bobbinup
Bobbindown Bobbinup Butt’flyyyy

… and I couldn't help taking it entirely wrong (sorry, roges) and thinking that flies in the back of trousers and underwear could save one from having to remove such articles of clothing for #2.

Any thoughts? Shall we start a letter-writing campaign to clothing manufacturers? Are there other obvious improvements to clothing that no one has thought of until now or no one has made?

[booklady]

Any thoughts? ANY THOUGHTS?!

Yes, I have a thought. Someone has kidnapped our dignified gentleman Joe, who attends concerts at the Hayden and Handel Society, cooks elegant meals, preaches at mass and serves communion, and is well-read and educated to the nines, and replaced him with this obvious imposter talking about #2.

[liriodendron]

Didn't they make longjohns like that?

[hartlikeawheel]

Marion told me to stop drooling on the keyboard but I think sir joe has pulled another one off again!

When I was growing up I could have sworn that there were buttons which held up a sorta flappy thingy in the back of mens' long johns.

Now I have some pretty serious questions about this.

First of all why didn't they call them short johns? Was there some kind of a macho thing going on there?
Secondly what was the connection with the john. I thought that was the potty and to be avoided while the long johns were on.
Thirdly I've always been suspicious about that little exit in the front of the johns and wondered if there were ever a man alive who bothered to piddle around with it.

I know that I will go to my grave never knowing the answers to the secrets about mens' undies. And it will be even worse - awfully embarrassing - to have to ask an angel, undies questions probably not being their particular speciality but just thought I'd bring them up in case an answer may arise.

[joew]

Yes, apparently in the olden days there were flaps in the back of men's long underwear. Old as I am, I never had any such, nor can I recall seeing any. I have only seen pictures. Why long underwear was/is called longjohns, I do not know.

But they were flaps in the longjohns, not precisely flies.

Come to think of it, buttflaps might work better than buttflies. It would be interesting to see how clothing designers would treat them if they became a normal part of both inner and outerwear.

[hartlikeawheel]

Sheesh, joe, you can't possibly insinuate that you are younger than I. Or maybe people in Massachusetts just never bothered with long johns. Disingenuous, I suspect.

And I can't imagine how horrible it must have been to have flies in your underwear. Must have made a deacon rather frisky during the times when they were supposed to look dignified. Winking, Hon.

So inquiring minds want to know. Who buttoned and unbuttoned the flappers? Did it just make wives back into mommies again?

And what did flappers have to do with women from the twenties?

Boy. There are some serious things to consider here.

And still I am dying to know if there is a man alive who uses that front thingy-dingy. Betcha not. They can just sell them for more money since they put a little more effort into the sewing.

Do you still get to go to heaven if you don't wear any underwear at all? I wasn't born with any on and wonder if it was in the great plan of things.

[joew]

A propos flies —

The Boston Herald has a columnist named Howie Carr. Usually he's pretty terrible. He seems to think that every civil servant is a "hack," and he uses innuendo against all sorts of his targets.But when he gets someone you don't like in his sights, he can be pretty amusing. For example, I don't like Ted Kennedy, so I was amused when he lampooned the children's book supposedly authored by Kennedy's dog Splash. Carr supplied some additional text for the book, including a bit where Splash tells of Kennedy and Chris Dodd going to lunch at a fancy restaurant. Among the hijinks that ensue, Kennedy says, "Waitress, I've got a fly in my pants."

[Trusty]

I've too much to do right now, but to save the community from the distress of wondering about a much-needed article of clothing, I found this article that tries to help us.

[rogesgallery]

Dickies. Huh? where did that come from.

This one for you brut.

[rogesgallery]

I keep GoinGoinGoin
Though my buns aren't showin
Keep that ...

Could someone finish this for me, I gotta go

[hartlikeawheel]

roges,

Frederick's of Hollywood
Says if you could
Then suggests that you shoud
Improve the bulk of your butt
It makes them some money
And makes you look like a honey.
Unless you should run into a slim-butt man
Then you have to run to the can
And lose some weight quick
To make you look slick.
A woman just can't win though she tries
Through thin and thick.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

roges! If you think I'm gonna touch that with a seven inch pole you must be expecting too much from me. Hope everything came out okay.

Giggling with you, Sweetie, and just thought of astronaughts and diapers! Wouldn't you? I would. Imagine debarking and not being able to smell your gift. Here's a dozen roses and you'd probably have to hold them behind your back. Or tell somebody stuffed snow down your pantses.

'scuse. This was all written from a woman's perspective so
I guess you'll have to ask again from one of the men around here.















I don't know?

"That flap open."

I'm not going any further than that.

[joew]

admin said:

I've too much to do right now, but to save the community from the distress of wondering about a much-needed article of clothing, I found this article that tries to help us.

Good going, trusty. Last Christmas my brother, the one who lives in Boston, gave me a book by Quinion about origins of words and phrases. The link of "long johns" to the Boston Strong Boy makes sense in light of the picture. So if the origin is not merely because of assonance, that may well be it.

[mike]

rogesgallery said:

I keep GoinGoinGoin
Though my buns aren't showin
Keep that ...

Could someone finish this for me, I gotta go

I keep GoinGoinGoin
Though my buns aren't showin
Disposable diapers are,
What keep my Rosy cheeks glowing!

[hartlikeawheel]

The appropriate answer to Kennedy's complaint about a fly in his pants is, "Don't worry sir. He won't eat much."

[gailkate]

Did Joe say assonance?

[joew]

gailkate said:

Did Joe say assonance?

Yes. And I meant it.

[rogesgallery]

Well I see the dickie question still dangles in the virtual wind. I guess I'll have to google it for myself. Seems someone would have had an answer to the origin of dickie since we're mostly all old enough to remember when every man had one. Women too, they were good hicky hiders in warm weather-- Question to ponder: where have all the hicky's gone? (possible lyric)

Is it possible that the dickies rise was a Southern latitudinal response to the need for fuctional emolation of the British Rock fashion of the mid 60s (a la the Byrds 1965) and it's longevity continuously renewed though a fascination for winter sport/fashion Icons such as Franz Klamer. The Dickie's slump, though does seem to suspiciously coincide with the rise of polypropylene.

Ah, there it is again that subtle link to terr'rizm via Big Oil. Thats gotta be it, Big Oil invented and funded terr'rizm in order to further their ambitions in the fashion market! The dickie was squeezed out to make room for polypropylene. Every thing was progressing well except in the middle east where they refused to move away from their antiquated attatchment to Natural Fibers. When Saadam began flaunting his devotion to fine wool suits in public, Big Oil decided he would have to be "subtlely illiminated". [1]

Are you following me here? Good. Big Oil needed a man on the inside; a sheep in wolves clothing so to speak. That's when they enlisted the skills of gwb, an imperfect pawn in polyester, a close petroleum based cousin... Or maybe that was Carl Rove. Close enough for mini-guns and daisy-cuttes anyway. The stage was set for Big Oils total control of the fashion market.

And that folks, is how The dickie died, george bush lied, the middle east cried, and Big Oil thrived. The rest is history/Eyes only.

Footnote:
[1] Saadam was hung in a polyester suit. That is what the heated disscussion was about at the gallows.

Roges...Disspelling the myth story of history

[Tillie]

'A serious and good philosophical work could be written consisting entirely of jokes.'

[joew]

This is getting confusing —

When dickies were first mentioned, I thought the reference was to a brand of trousers. Now it seems that the reference is to a detachable shirt front. And it is not clear what Saddam's being hung has to do with either, although it would seem to have more to do with his trousers than with his shirt front, especially if Dickies brand garments have a fuller cut in front for those more amply endowed. But I can't see any relation between the size of his endowment and the shirt front.

[booklady]

I think my husband bought some work boots from a brand called Dickies.

Funny, since he allows people to call him "Dick".

[Trusty]

joew said:

...although it would seem to have more to do with his trousers than with his shirt front, especially if Dickies brand garments have a fuller cut in front for those more amply endowed.

Years ago in church, after the choir had sung a very stunning anthem, our pastor walked up on stage and WAS GOING to say, "Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD." (Psalm 150:6)

However, as he started to say it, his eyes scanned the congregation where a very well-endowed lady was sitting on the front row in her low-cut summer dress.

Yes, that's right. It really came out as, "Let every thing that hath breasts praise the LORD." He turned his face from the congregation, but the choir saw him and couldn't help but start snickering.

It's was fun to be in the choir. ;D

[rogesgallery]

This is not Elmer Fudd's dickie. Sometime in the late 60s a fad swept ...well it swept through my neighborhood. It was a turtleneck dickie designed, not for the shirt-front, but for the neckline. They had a small cloth front and back which was just big enough to fill in the V of a shirt with the top button open. If worn alone by the well endowed it would fit like John Holmes in a loin cloth.

I was too young to know any thing about fashion aside from the fact that California was a year ahead of Washington. This led to some argument as to how far away California really was if it took a year to get a truckload of jeans from there to here.

Joe? You're going to have to read that post very carefully to clearly discern the association between the dickie and Saadam. There is the tiniest bit of politics in that humor and the EPA has set the toxicity level for politics at 1milligram to 100,000 voters. They haven't done a thing to limit the levels though.

Hint-
Big oil attacks Big cotton,
for its peice of fashion pie,
cotton falters for some years
but once again it starts to rise
By this time Big oil doesn't care
It doesn't need the fashion thing
It's amine esthers are the rage
For plastics which are everywhere
Big plastic's now the longjohn King

Maybe the turtleneck dickie didn't go over well in CA or any where else in the world and WA ended up with all of them. Actually I've got one in a drawer here that I picked up in a thrift store as a nostalgic novellty.